Hi again chrissy, I’ve just been reading in the paper(oldham chronicle,sports page) that oldham athletic have made a tentative approach to your management, for you to appear at there ground for concerts(which is the ambition I want to see), that will also involve other bands. If this is true( can’t believe everything they say) will you give it your utmost consideration please. For one thing, you would be helping my club and also you would be on my doorstep, thus saving this pauper the boredome and expense of going all the way to butlins, and you could always call in our house for a brew. mark (your stalker)

Dear Mark
I don’t know anything about this. It is not true. Now get out of my vegetable patch.
CB